Serpent’s Tail Poem: my first attempt at it

Photo by NASA on Unsplash.

Inspired by the Sunday Whirl #443 and Jane Dougherty’s serpent’s tail form.

@Jane Dougherty, remember how weeks ago, I said I wanted to try your form? Well, here it is! I took a couple of liberties with it, based on how the poem was flowing.

 

Upon the currents of the air,

Bare as the trees’ black arms against the sky,

Slyly moves this sentiment,

Lent to me through somber flesh and blood,

Flooding all my caverns through:

True that I am not complete, but lost,

Tossed in harsh currents like the tide;

Aside from nothing, nothing is bereft,

Left longing for Unknown; the feel

Peels off my body with astringent ease–

Trees understand, are reaching far,

Star-high beyond this planet; something there

Tears at my limit out of turn;

Yearns now the body as it lingers on.

 

~H

8 thoughts on “Serpent’s Tail Poem: my first attempt at it

  1. Wonderfuli! I’ve had quite a few people saying either oh, I know this one, it goes like this…then proceed to write a very different form of poem, or people who have attempted it but not used true rhymes.You not only wrote a poem that makes sense, keeping a proper rhyme scheme, but you ended on a rhyme with the first sound. I’m pleased you attempted it, and admiring of the result.

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    1. The serpent’s tail form is where the last word of a line rhymes with the first word of the next line. The lines can be of uniform length or they can vary, as they do in my poem. Also, the last word of the last line must rhyme with the first word of the first line (in my case, “on” rhymes with “upon”). Jane does a much better job of describing the form. She says, “Any line length, no set number of lines and no meter. To make the serpent, the last word of each line rhymes with the first word of the following line with the last line being the same as the first, so the serpent eats its own tail. The last part is the tricky bit.” https://janedougherty.wordpress.com/2017/01/28/serpents-tail/

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